Happy 7th my sweet sweet boy

 My Sweet sweet baby boy Ansh, 

Let me begin by saying that I love you so much that each year these letters get tougher and tougher to write as I get more and more emotional over you growing up! 

I know my job as your mom is to raise you up to be a man. You won’t stay my little boy forever. One day you will leave our house and marry and have a family of your own…. OMG! Okay, I wasn’t ready for that. 

I’m going to park that thought until we must cross that bridge. 

You’re my biggest blessing. Know that I will always be there for you (even if I get mad at you sometimes for taking 20 minutes to just put your shoes on ;)) 

Seven Years ago today, I saw your beautiful face for the very first time and I fell madly in love. 

My heart couldn’t contain all that love, and it started to flow through my eyes. I remember that moment so vividly when you made me mom. 

You were an 8.1 pounds, perfectly gorgeous baby with a head full of hair and an infectious smile. I can remember the hours that followed were filled with complete and total bliss. Your dad and nani were here to welcome you in person and everybody else on facetime fighting each other to see you. 

There was so much chaos as to who will hold you next and touch your sweet hands and feet. 

Our first night at the hospital, you laid next to me while I watched you sleep. 

I felt the rhythm of your breathing. I gazed at the precious swoop of your nose, the soft flutter of your eyelashes, the length of your fingers, the curves of your cheeks. I soaked in all the little details of you. I promise I won’t do that when you’re a teenager. 

You definitely get your good looks and that wit, and sarcastic humor from your dad, but your heart? Your heart and sensitivity come directly from me. Yup! I take full credit for that. I made you, so I take credit for you :)

I want you to know that your heart makes you special. It makes you unique, and stronger. You’ll never leave anyone behind. You’ll never forget an important day. You don’t flinch before sharing your toys with your lil sister and brother, even though you know you might never see it in one piece again. And I think, that is what makes you the best big brother ever. 

You’ll probably cry if you don’t make the team, if you don’t get into the college you want, when a girl breaks your heart and when you graduate from high school. But the good news is – I’ll be crying right along with you, so we’ll be there to lean on each other. 

You are smart. Wicked smart. Don’t ever forget that smart is cool. Sometimes you say things that blow my mind, and I’m left stumped. 

Like the other day, you were showing your science experiment to your dad, and your dad said, 

“Are you a doctor yet?” 

And you immediately responded saying, “I’m just a kid dad” 

If I had to give you a piece of advice, it’ll be “Smart is cool, but so is trying again”. 

Sometimes, you get disappointed when you don’t win, and you give up easily. My goal is to teach you how persistence and grit is crucial in life. Remember that success is a lousy teacher. Effort matters. 

You did well in first grade, Buddy, and I’m so very proud of you, but starting next year, homework is going to take longer than 10 minutes. Just a friendly warning from your loving Mommy ;) 

Your teacher this year brags and brags on you which fills my heart with pride. 

She said, in her own words, “If teachers were allowed to pick a favorite kid in class, Ansh would be mine. He is kind to his friends, listens to instructions patiently, and always helps his peers out. He has a big heart” 

You truly are a light to your peers. The best part about you is that you lead without being a “know it all” and you are a friend to everyone. 

 My favorite part of the day is when you come running of the bus to meet me and tell me all about how your day was. I love the excitement you have when you see me. I cherish that moment!!! 

Sometimes I worry for you because I fear you’re too fragile. Timid, sometimes nervous to stand up for yourself. I fear you might get bullied in school. I see a bit of myself in you, and so I have this urge to protect you all the time. 

Right now, at seven, you come to me with everything. You are completely transparent. If you get in trouble at school, if you make a bad decision, if you are mean to your sister, you confide in me. We have our own little secrets, and it’s so fun to keep them from dad sometimes ;) It’s like you and me against the world. 

I realize as you get older, turning to me may not always seems as easy, but know this, I will always be here for you, no matter what. I WANT you to come to me – with questions, with worries, with concerns. I am here to protect and guide you – forever. 

Did I mention I don’t want you to grow up? That I don’t want you to ever stop snuggling with me at night or early in the morning? I want to hold you tight forever. I’m sorry that I can’t make it for your bedtime every night but know that I miss you dearly when I’m not there. I don’t ever want you to stop saying, “I love you” in the middle of the day. I hope you won’t ever be embarrassed to run and jump in my arms in celebration after winning a game. 

Here are a few of my favorite moments from this year: 

1. 

Me: “Ansh, what theme do you want for your birthday this year?” 

Ansh, “Mom, how about you surprise me” 

2.

Ansh, “Mama I made a surprise for you for mother’s day” 

Me, “oh yeah? What is it?” 

Ansh, “I can’t tell you. It’s a surprise. I have to give it to you on Sunday. But I’ve been working very hard on it” 

(20 seconds later) Ansh, “Mama, can you promise me that whatever I’m about to tell you, you will forget till Sunday?” 

3.

When I came to your school for a demo, you introduced me as, “This is my mom. Her name is Deepali. And in Hindi, I call her “Ma”” 

4.

Me: “Ansh, you wanna go to Mexico next month. We can swim in the ocean there” 

Ansh: “Mom, I would rather just go to Nikita’s house” 😂🙄 

5.

Me, “Ansh, if you don’t clean up your toys in the next hour, I’m going to throw them all away” 

Ansh starts crying and goes to his room to clean up. 

Comes back 2 minutes later 

Ansh, “Mom, if you don’t help me clean up, I will go and live with Abhishek and Tanya” 

6.

You participated in your first ever dance showcase this year. It was such a proud moment for me to see you own the stage. A few of my favorite moments from the showcase:  

 - During tech rehearsal, you sat in between Jaspreet and Shibani in the audience and said, “Oh! What a wonderful moment. I’m sitting in between my best friends.” 

 - When Nolan came to see you after the performance, you said, “come let me show you backstage and introduce you to my friends”. 

Surprisingly, all of YOUR friends” were not your dance buddies, but all MY dance buddies ;) and then you said, “Yeah! Everyone here knows me pretty well” 

- The moment where you were supposed to be on the stage for next act, and no one could find you because you went to sit with Abhishek in the audience ;) 

- You found your newest best friend in Rucha. Throughout the showcase you were stuck to her like a limb. So much so, that when you went to India to visit your grandparents and they asked you if you want to stay back in India, you said, “I would love to, but I need to go back to Seattle because my best friend Rucha is there” 

Oh Ansh, you’re the happiest and kindest person I know. You have my heart. Happy 7th birthday, my sweet small dude…. I love you very, very much.

Love,

Mom