Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Three days is Long. Three years, too short!


Someone pinch me.....is my “baby boy” seriously 3 already?!?! Okay, at some point I will stop calling you my baby, at least in front of others.
It feels like just yesterday I was writing a letter to you on your first and second birthdays. A minute ago we were celebrating the fact that you were finally walking—right around the time you turned 18 months—and now? fast forward (I mean REALLLLY FAST) 3 years and I’m so in love with this character that you have become. 

It’s so bittersweet how I anxiously await you to grow, hoping you shape and mold into a great person and yet at the same time I yearn for the seconds to slow and the sun to not set proof that another day ticked on by… hoping, wishing you will stay this shape and this small and this little forever…

As cliché as it sounds, on this day I am going to reminisce the day you were born.
Three years ago, after 17 hours of labor, at 5:17 PM, my perfect 8.1-pound gorgeous baby boy graced this planet with his presence. The world’s been a better and brighter place since then. You were perfect! And I’m not just saying that because I’m your mom. Look at that face…


My heart exploded the moment I saw you and you immediately grabbed onto my fingers and held on for your dear life. I remember that moment so clearly (probably because I revisited my pictures, videos, and blogs few minutes ago), your tiny hands wrapped around my fingertips and I knew immediately our connection would be forever. So many things racing through my mind but most of all I just wanted you to know that I would love you forever and that I would do everything in my power to protect you. 

I remember our first night at the hospital, when you laid next to me while I watched you sleep. Sounds creepier than it was. I felt the rhythm of your breathing. I gazed at the precious swoop of your nose, the soft flutter of your eyelashes, the length of your fingers, the curves of your cheeks. I soaked in all the little details of you.

Over the last year you’ve really shown us what you’re interested in. You love trains, cars, trucks, bikes… basically, anything with wheels. You have a real fascination with race cars, cranes, and garbage trucks. Coming up with a theme for your room wasn’t too hard for us (though, your dad really wanted to go with Garbage truck). Your newest fascination is Super Wings and Mater. It’s so funny how you pick up nuances and apply them in real life. Like the other day, we went to Shilpi and Abhi’s house and you rang the bell. When Shilpi didn’t answer the door after 3 rings, you immediately uttered, “Oh no! It’s time to call the Super Wings!”



You’re crazy funny too. Like the other day, this is what our conversation was:
You: Mom, you like Dizzy (a character from Super Wings)?
Me: No, I like Jet (another character from Super Wings)
You: No mom, you like Dizzy.
Me: No Ansh, I like Jet
You: No, Ansh like Dizzy, Mom like Dizzy
Me: No, mom like Mater
You: Moooom!  Mater is not Super Wings. Silly Mom!
Me: (I laughed). Okay, I like Dizzy
You: You like Dizzy, I like Dizzy, Everybody like Dizzy! Yay!
When did you start speaking full sentences hon?


You are a complete and utter Mama’s boy. Kind and sweet are just a few adjectives I use to describe your personality. It is engrained within you to take care of me and I’m not quite sure how that came to be. I feel safe with you since the little age of 2. Watching out for your Mama and making sure I’m okay. You have brought tears to my eyes at some of the things your little mind tells me. Sometimes when I am upset, and you say, “Mama, you need a hug?”… You know how to make your Mama turn into absolute and utter MUSH.




No matter how hard the week was—or how hard the year’s been for us—you will always put a smile on my face. You are the reason I can get through the tough times; you’re my motivation for everything. I’m grateful every day of my life for this amazing, perfect little creature we created.

Sharing. Taking turns. Looking out for others. Gentle with babies. Not afraid of the dark but surely scared of pressure cooker. Curious. Motivated. Determined. And BUSY. Your hands must be in it all. You enjoy when you are included in on big people activities. You love hanging out with my dance buddies. As soon as I pick you up from Daycare, you insist that I take you to meet “friends”. You know a few names and are still learning others. You know Muggi, Sumi, Yogesh, Bani, Mittin, and Sat(ish). Others are still “friends”, but you enjoy hanging out with them. This makes things much easier for me coz I am least worried about you when I’m in dance class. I know you’ll be fine. You make my life easy.

A few months ago, it hit me how independent you’ve become.

Like the other day, you were trying to Potty train me. You wanted to hold my hand and guide me 😊 That was hilarious and we both burst into laughter.

You don’t need me for everything anymore, and that’s hard on a mom. I thought parenting would get easier…it has in many ways, but sometimes I miss the days when you couldn’t do anything without me. Seeing you grow into this well-mannered, kind-hearted person, loving preschool, making friends on your own, developing your own identity, your own jokes, your own laugh, a great imagination and ambition to try to do everything yourself… I love the person you’ve become, but can you slow down a little?

The thing about you that’s never changed is your excitement over everyday things, like “green Juice”. You’ve had that every day since you were 1 year old, yet still react like it’s the first time. You have what we call your “excited face” and it’s truly the best. It’s the same excitement when I come to pick you up from daycare. You run towards me and your first words are, “Mom, Green juice and chocolate?”

Last night we both curled up in your bed, read bed time stories, sang songs, and you fell asleep on my belly. I don’t always allow this, but I make exceptions when you aren’t feeling too well or are really in need of some extra cuddles. Or if I’m in need of some extra cuddles. It’s mostly latter than former. You are so snuggly and sweet.


Today, you’re getting wishes from across the world and it makes me very emotional. How else are you supposed to feel when people celebrate, cherish and marvel at the love of your life? You are already a giver, my love, and I want you to remember that there’s no religion bigger than “LOVE”. And that’s how I wish to raise you. Your religion is Love.


My hope for you this next year, is that you continue to explore the things you love and try new things. I hope you keep making more friends and show the world how bright your light shines. I’m excited to see how much you learn and hear more of what you’re thinking about.

Everyone we know mentions how sweet you are, and I hope you never lose that. I hope you grow up to be a polite, brilliant, handsome young man who is kind to others.

I’m so proud to be your mommy. I feel so lucky that you’re my son. Even though you give me a run for my money sometimes, but you have so much joy just bursting out of you all the time. You are the perfect little boy for me, and for that I’m so thankful.


Know that I’m always here for you, and I love you more than you know! And you know what? No matter how big you get, you’ll always be my baby.

With love from the bottom of my heart,
Mommy


3 comments:

Unknown said...

Loved every bit of it.

Unknown said...

This is really damn sweet.. Ansh is gonna love it!!

Jaya Lalwani said...

Can't wait for the time when he's able to read all this!!! U rock mommy ����