Saturday, January 19, 2019

Uri - Viewpoint of an Army Brat!


My first blog post of 2019, and I’m writing it with High Josh (enthusiasm). Just got back from the theater after watching much awaited film – Uri, and boy, does it hit the right notes in your body or what? I left the theater with additional pride, spine a bit more erect and chest out. Not only because I am a proud Indian Army kid, but because I am proud of the decision to conduct surgical strikes across LoC in Pakistan occupied Kashmir. There have been multiple cowardly attacks on India by terrorists infiltrated into our borders via Pakistan, but this one particularly hit me very hard. Our soldiers were asleep for God’s sake. At least show the courage to have a face off with them. I remember crying under my pillow for days after Uri attack. There was a need to send a response back to Pakistan, and the message went out loud and clear.

Image result for uri movie stills

The portrayal of Vicky Kaushal as an Army officer is spot on. I can say that because I saw glimpses of my dad in him. That built, that uniform, the heaviness in his voice, his relationship with his family, emoting vulnerability, and strength. It’s as close to reality as it can get.

Image result for uri movie stills

The movie has no heavy-duty loud mouthing of dialogues just because it’s a war movie. Neither does it have any unnecessary drama. There is not a single shot of Tiranga (India's National Flag) through the movie, and yet the nationalistic pride and patriotism is all over it. There are many goosebumps moments in the movie and some highly emotional scenes bound to bring involuntary tears to the eyes. Paired with heavy background music, amazing VFX, smart action sequences, brilliant direction, and the requisite of some fist pumping dialogues, this movie will leave you with a high dose of adrenal, love for your country and ultimate respect for Indian Army.

My particularly favorite scene was the dinner party hosted for Vihaan at his sister’s house. It wasn’t a very relevant scene, but it was beautifully shot. You could tell that the makers of the movie have done their homework. All the officers looking dapper in their suits, cufflinks, lapel pins, a perfectly folded handkerchief in their suit pocket, holding a glass of whisky and laughing loudly. Ladies with gracefully draped sarees, brooch pin, a glass of drink in one hand and a clutch in the other, looking as sharp as their better halves. This particular scene brought back so many memories to me. Army parties like these were a weekly affair for us. All the ‘Army brats’ of the cantonment would get together, feast on tasty snacks (mostly roasted peanuts or cheese with pineapple on a toothpick), play games, watch TV and stealthily sneak into the kitchen to get a peek of the desert.


I’m not sure why we were called Army brats, but we would take immense pride in being called that. I think it refers to any child who has grown up with a parent in the army, has never lived in a place more than 3 years, made new friends with every posting & stayed connected with most of them, lived in cantonments, and would know atleast a few people who have served in the highest battleground on earth, Siachen (In our case, it was our dad and his troops). We are that breed of kids who are raised in and transferred from one cantonment to another. Our upbringing in a unique way differentiates us from other kids. This is also the reason it is easy for one army brat to recognize another one easily. For us, home is the army and everything it stands for. We are raised with immense pride, fearlessness and courage; imbibed in us by our lioness moms (mostly because our dads were barely around). That is the reason why you saw Col MN Rai’s brave and proud daughter shouting his regiments war cry at his funeral, then raised her hand to salute him for the last time as she burst out in tears. That moment is beautifully recreated in Uri, and is bound to choke you up. The movie hits a bull’s eye.

Image result for Col MN Rai's daughter



You might like the movie for different reasons, but one thing’s for sure. Next time anyone asks you “How’s the josh?”, you’ll involuntary end up saying “High Sir!”


Monday, July 2, 2018

Dreams do come true - Have the courage to pursue them


Today, my heart is exploding with immense love, gratitude, happiness, and pure bliss. I am walking with my head held up high and reminding myself of what we have achieved. My eyes have been moist for 2 days now and I can’t stop reminiscing every stage of this journey. Every failure, the fear of uncertainty, all those mistakes and the learning that came with it, starting from the scratch, getting to know tiny nuances, practicing, practicing even more, learning as we progressed, getting a lot better and then finally succeeding. Probably this is what it feels like when your dreams come true.



Ever since I was a kid, I’ve wanted to do my own production – lights, cameras, actors, dancers, costumes, props, and audiences cheering us on. Oh! those cheers! Those loud, never fading cheers rang in my ears like they were real. No matter where I ended up in life, I’ve always wanted to be a performer.

9 months ago, I put together a team of equally enthusiastic people. People who shared the same passion as me, but even more talented. A team, that we referred to as “Prod Core”, a team that would end up spending every minute of the next 9 months working on this project, a team that would discover their own flair for craft in the next 9 months, a team that would overcome every hurdle and completely crush it, a team that when stands together is capable of taking down the city with a storm, a team that’s so close-knit that we call it “family”. Abhishek, Anusha, Ashish, Jaspreet, Jyoti, Mounica, Nikita, Nitin, Pooja, Satish, Shibani, Sumit, Tanya, Tejal, and Yogesh (in alphabetic order 😉). That day (27th September 2017) everyone parked their lives aside to make this dream a reality. My dream became OUR dream.


The good old Royal Drummer days


As we moved forward, we quickly realized that there’s so much more to be discovered. None of us knew what we were getting into. The more we explored, the more we grasped that this wasn’t going to be easy. Right from booking the venue, to conducting auditions, to looking for a non-profit partner, to writing a script, to overall project management – all this with our regular 9-5 jobs were some of the initial challenges we faced. All 16 of us spent every evening of the initial months at my house working till midnight and then we would retire for the day, only to start again next day. But as time passed, we kept adding more members to our family. Team Redmond Indian Cultural Association (RICA) was one of the first additions who selflessly agreed to partner with us in our expedition. They understood what we were trying to create, and they became a part of our day to day struggles.

To sow the seed of good karma, we also partnered up with Sukarya, and decided to put on the show as a benefit performance for their mission to help women and children in the slums of India. Now, the pressure was on and we had nothing. No prior experience, no money, no venue, no resources. We were in this all by ourselves. “We” were all we had.

We started spreading the word, conducted auditions lead by Pooja and slowly we saw our family grow from 16 people to 55 people. As the family grew, there was a risk of losing sight of our core values – karma, building a family, creating a happy place, spreading joy. A lot of people had told me that with a group as big as this, it’s not possible to be a family. I’d like to challenge those people and ask them to come, look at what we’ve created. It’s an unbreakable bond between 55 people who look out for each other, laugh together, cry together, and stand by each other. Family isn’t always blood. It’s people in your life who want you in theirs. It’s people who’d love you no matter what. This is my family!

After our first successful audition



Throughout this journey, we’ve faced many such situations where we felt discouraged, lost and honestly, we didn’t know if we could do this. Like, we lost our venue in the middle of our journey, and our potential sponsors were turning us down. So basically, until February, we had no money and no venue, but we had 55 hopeful eyes and a strong will.  

No one can make our dreams come true for us… it is our job to get up every day and work towards it… We came up with a plan and set goals that will help us achieve that plan. And then we got to work. Not just for a day or a week or a month. But for as long as it took to accomplish our dream. We treated making our dreams come true as our actual jobs – we showed up on time, put in a full effort, learned from our mistakes, reviewed our performance, pivot when necessary, tracked our progress each day, then got some rest to wake up tomorrow refreshed and ready to get back to work. It took a toll on a lot of us, but we were there to cover up for each other. We held each other through thick and thin.

The entire team stepped up and together we created magic! Jyoti, Sumit, Anusha, Tejal, Pooja and Jaspreet focused all their energy into finding us a venue on such a short notice. The branding team created world class marketing material for the show. From video snapshots, to posters, to logo, everything was beyond exceptional. Nitin, Shibani, Jyoti, Sumit and Urvashi are loaded with talent. Along with Apurva, Poorva, Mounica, Harsh and Amol, the branding team nailed it. Because the branding team was making such good progress in creating a buzz on social media, the sponsorship team started advancing at their end. Mounica, Pooja, Tejal, Jineta, Anusha, Yogesh, Gaurav, Poorva and Harsh came up with some brilliant sponsorship ideas and together we reached out to potential sponsors. Initially, the thought of asking people to invest their money in a new group, made me uncomfortable. But the kind of talent this team was showing me, I could walk down the street and convince random folks to invest in us.  Suddenly, everything was falling in place. Now we had enough money to invest in costumes and props. Sakina, Urvashi, Mumal, Jineta, Apurva, Tanya, Abhishek, Sumit, and Casey created some props that left the audiences spell bound. It certainly didn’t feel like this was our first production. The level of props made us look professionals. The actors (Abhishek, Tejal, Poorva, Annwesha, and Siddhart) were practicing all day, everyday. The dancers didn’t take a single day off either. If you’ve seen us perform anywhere, you’d know that my dance routines tend to get very high energetic. Spending that kind of energy every day is no joke. But the commitment entire team showed is commendable. We walked around with tired bodies and sleep deprived minds for nearly 3-4 months.



The script written by Abhishek, Yogesh, Shibani, Nikita and Jaspreet was relatable and deeply touching. To do justice to this script, Satish and Abhishek, along with Shibani, Nikita, Yogesh and Ashish directed every scene with so much attention to detail. Every scene was mesmerizing, and every shot was breathtaking.


Until you step your foot into it, you never realize how much work it takes. Such was the case with sound and lighting. I have seen Jyoti, Ashish, Aalisha, and Gaurav exchange messages at 2am while working on music. Ashutosh spent hours to make sure the lights did justice to some beautiful projections Shibani, Sumit, Nidhi, Urvashi, Pavan, Nitin, Jineta, Ankita and Nilanjan put together.

Miracles start to happen when you give as much energy to your dreams as you do to your fears.
Managing 55 people was one of our biggest challenge at this point and that’s where Abhijeet, Tanya, Anusha and Tejal stepped up. Creating schedules and accommodating everyone’s requests. I’m not even sure how they ever got any sleep. Somewhere down the line, we brought Abhijeet into our team. He was that one missing piece from our puzzle, and we saw everything fall in place thereafter.

A big shout out to Pooja and Paresh for helping us with stage management. And another big applause to Shibani, Sumit and Anup for documenting this entire journey through their gorgeous pictures.

I am sure I am missing a lot of people here who’ve helped me fulfill my dream. A big thanks to every person who put their life and soul into creating what we did.

I am also extremely thankful to my husband for being so supportive throughout this journey. For playing the role of a single parent for days when I didn’t get home in time. I could do all that I did, only because I knew you were there. And lastly, my very supportive parents who have always taught me to chase my dreams rather than regret later. It’s because of this support system that I can afford to take risks in my life.


It took a huge portion of my life to believe that I was capable of putting so much effort to make my dreams come true. But now, I am ready to take on the world. One step at a time. One theatre at a time!









Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Three days is Long. Three years, too short!


Someone pinch me.....is my “baby boy” seriously 3 already?!?! Okay, at some point I will stop calling you my baby, at least in front of others.
It feels like just yesterday I was writing a letter to you on your first and second birthdays. A minute ago we were celebrating the fact that you were finally walking—right around the time you turned 18 months—and now? fast forward (I mean REALLLLY FAST) 3 years and I’m so in love with this character that you have become. 

It’s so bittersweet how I anxiously await you to grow, hoping you shape and mold into a great person and yet at the same time I yearn for the seconds to slow and the sun to not set proof that another day ticked on by… hoping, wishing you will stay this shape and this small and this little forever…

As cliché as it sounds, on this day I am going to reminisce the day you were born.
Three years ago, after 17 hours of labor, at 5:17 PM, my perfect 8.1-pound gorgeous baby boy graced this planet with his presence. The world’s been a better and brighter place since then. You were perfect! And I’m not just saying that because I’m your mom. Look at that face…


My heart exploded the moment I saw you and you immediately grabbed onto my fingers and held on for your dear life. I remember that moment so clearly (probably because I revisited my pictures, videos, and blogs few minutes ago), your tiny hands wrapped around my fingertips and I knew immediately our connection would be forever. So many things racing through my mind but most of all I just wanted you to know that I would love you forever and that I would do everything in my power to protect you. 

I remember our first night at the hospital, when you laid next to me while I watched you sleep. Sounds creepier than it was. I felt the rhythm of your breathing. I gazed at the precious swoop of your nose, the soft flutter of your eyelashes, the length of your fingers, the curves of your cheeks. I soaked in all the little details of you.

Over the last year you’ve really shown us what you’re interested in. You love trains, cars, trucks, bikes… basically, anything with wheels. You have a real fascination with race cars, cranes, and garbage trucks. Coming up with a theme for your room wasn’t too hard for us (though, your dad really wanted to go with Garbage truck). Your newest fascination is Super Wings and Mater. It’s so funny how you pick up nuances and apply them in real life. Like the other day, we went to Shilpi and Abhi’s house and you rang the bell. When Shilpi didn’t answer the door after 3 rings, you immediately uttered, “Oh no! It’s time to call the Super Wings!”



You’re crazy funny too. Like the other day, this is what our conversation was:
You: Mom, you like Dizzy (a character from Super Wings)?
Me: No, I like Jet (another character from Super Wings)
You: No mom, you like Dizzy.
Me: No Ansh, I like Jet
You: No, Ansh like Dizzy, Mom like Dizzy
Me: No, mom like Mater
You: Moooom!  Mater is not Super Wings. Silly Mom!
Me: (I laughed). Okay, I like Dizzy
You: You like Dizzy, I like Dizzy, Everybody like Dizzy! Yay!
When did you start speaking full sentences hon?


You are a complete and utter Mama’s boy. Kind and sweet are just a few adjectives I use to describe your personality. It is engrained within you to take care of me and I’m not quite sure how that came to be. I feel safe with you since the little age of 2. Watching out for your Mama and making sure I’m okay. You have brought tears to my eyes at some of the things your little mind tells me. Sometimes when I am upset, and you say, “Mama, you need a hug?”… You know how to make your Mama turn into absolute and utter MUSH.




No matter how hard the week was—or how hard the year’s been for us—you will always put a smile on my face. You are the reason I can get through the tough times; you’re my motivation for everything. I’m grateful every day of my life for this amazing, perfect little creature we created.

Sharing. Taking turns. Looking out for others. Gentle with babies. Not afraid of the dark but surely scared of pressure cooker. Curious. Motivated. Determined. And BUSY. Your hands must be in it all. You enjoy when you are included in on big people activities. You love hanging out with my dance buddies. As soon as I pick you up from Daycare, you insist that I take you to meet “friends”. You know a few names and are still learning others. You know Muggi, Sumi, Yogesh, Bani, Mittin, and Sat(ish). Others are still “friends”, but you enjoy hanging out with them. This makes things much easier for me coz I am least worried about you when I’m in dance class. I know you’ll be fine. You make my life easy.

A few months ago, it hit me how independent you’ve become.

Like the other day, you were trying to Potty train me. You wanted to hold my hand and guide me 😊 That was hilarious and we both burst into laughter.

You don’t need me for everything anymore, and that’s hard on a mom. I thought parenting would get easier…it has in many ways, but sometimes I miss the days when you couldn’t do anything without me. Seeing you grow into this well-mannered, kind-hearted person, loving preschool, making friends on your own, developing your own identity, your own jokes, your own laugh, a great imagination and ambition to try to do everything yourself… I love the person you’ve become, but can you slow down a little?

The thing about you that’s never changed is your excitement over everyday things, like “green Juice”. You’ve had that every day since you were 1 year old, yet still react like it’s the first time. You have what we call your “excited face” and it’s truly the best. It’s the same excitement when I come to pick you up from daycare. You run towards me and your first words are, “Mom, Green juice and chocolate?”

Last night we both curled up in your bed, read bed time stories, sang songs, and you fell asleep on my belly. I don’t always allow this, but I make exceptions when you aren’t feeling too well or are really in need of some extra cuddles. Or if I’m in need of some extra cuddles. It’s mostly latter than former. You are so snuggly and sweet.


Today, you’re getting wishes from across the world and it makes me very emotional. How else are you supposed to feel when people celebrate, cherish and marvel at the love of your life? You are already a giver, my love, and I want you to remember that there’s no religion bigger than “LOVE”. And that’s how I wish to raise you. Your religion is Love.


My hope for you this next year, is that you continue to explore the things you love and try new things. I hope you keep making more friends and show the world how bright your light shines. I’m excited to see how much you learn and hear more of what you’re thinking about.

Everyone we know mentions how sweet you are, and I hope you never lose that. I hope you grow up to be a polite, brilliant, handsome young man who is kind to others.

I’m so proud to be your mommy. I feel so lucky that you’re my son. Even though you give me a run for my money sometimes, but you have so much joy just bursting out of you all the time. You are the perfect little boy for me, and for that I’m so thankful.


Know that I’m always here for you, and I love you more than you know! And you know what? No matter how big you get, you’ll always be my baby.

With love from the bottom of my heart,
Mommy